The only way to survive the querying gauntlet is to tell yourself that success is only delayed. You cannot afford doubt, hard as it is to not lose self confidence. With every rejection, sooner or later you have to pick yourself up and keep going. A sense of humor helps. But it is a tough road.
I admire you for making yourself so vulnerable! That is a very difficult thing to do! A little like sending your child out into the world and hoping that someone sees them as you do… worthy of notice.
If it helps at all those of us who have friends who write but don’t write ourselves don’t think less of you because of the rejections! In fact we think more of you for trying!
Laurie, thank you for such kind words. To be worthy of notice is a beautiful thing, no matter what you do or who you are. (Now, I have that Backstreet Boys song in my head!) With a cheerleader like you, I truly cannot fail.
You know my story. Spent at least five years focused on writing a non-fiction but with so many rejections, etc. it was just natural to put it to the side--after about five drafts--and focus on children's weddings and then the arrival of grandchildren. Over twenty years, it has been collecting dust. Would the world still be interested, I ask? With no answer, it remains on the shelf.
I do know your story. And you know what? Maybe the time is right for a re-introduction of your manuscript to the world. Rejection is hard, but you and I are familiar with its sting - and that familiarity softens it just a little bit. I'll be rooting for you.
The query process totally sucks! An artist has put imagination, effort and work into creating a new thing. After many revisions and improvements the artist finally feels that the work is good. She has put herself into the creation. She begins sending it out. It gets ignored and many rejections. It's hard not to take these personally. It's a struggle to maintain hope for that one "yes". It is a painful process for the writer.
Great post Ted, I was figuring out my angle on this one and I was trying to compare to the experience of business guys like you and me. I guess we have had careers of multiple chances a week for people to not like our idea, slides, decision, meeting participation, hire, attitude at the moment (I'm leaving out 20 other reasons not to be liked just not coming to mind ha) and that was part of building tough skins or at least as tough as we could manage. But the artist version seems way more personal - as you say - put herself into the creation. And then two layers of people to like or not like - business and reader - both with a far more open access to the layer below skin, not for the faint of heart. Don't mind us, Susan..
I'd love to be well paid not to be liked! And who didn't like you two? You're pretty likeable people...And no, it's not all about the money. But it's hard not to factor it into the equation.
Joel, I love your posts and insights. Here, you have captured my corporate experience perfectly. BTW - I have thought of you often after listening to “the power of now“.
Yes a thousand cuts ha! But hopefully something good happened from the efforts. I'm really glad that suggestion has been helpful, picked it up out here in California hippie land
I "listened" to your words and what I heard was something I rarely hear: total honesty. Writing novels is a joy, but it is indeed a business. When the writing is done, it's time to trade your comfy author's hat for the less familiar hat of a sales person. It's never easy stepping out of one's comfort zone, but sometimes you just have to try. Thanks for sharing a truth about the trade we've chosen and keep writing!
The only way to survive the querying gauntlet is to tell yourself that success is only delayed. You cannot afford doubt, hard as it is to not lose self confidence. With every rejection, sooner or later you have to pick yourself up and keep going. A sense of humor helps. But it is a tough road.
As you well know. We'll see what happens now or then!
I admire you for making yourself so vulnerable! That is a very difficult thing to do! A little like sending your child out into the world and hoping that someone sees them as you do… worthy of notice.
If it helps at all those of us who have friends who write but don’t write ourselves don’t think less of you because of the rejections! In fact we think more of you for trying!
Laurie, thank you for such kind words. To be worthy of notice is a beautiful thing, no matter what you do or who you are. (Now, I have that Backstreet Boys song in my head!) With a cheerleader like you, I truly cannot fail.
Yes! Takes a lot of courage to be vulnerable.
You know my story. Spent at least five years focused on writing a non-fiction but with so many rejections, etc. it was just natural to put it to the side--after about five drafts--and focus on children's weddings and then the arrival of grandchildren. Over twenty years, it has been collecting dust. Would the world still be interested, I ask? With no answer, it remains on the shelf.
I do know your story. And you know what? Maybe the time is right for a re-introduction of your manuscript to the world. Rejection is hard, but you and I are familiar with its sting - and that familiarity softens it just a little bit. I'll be rooting for you.
The query process totally sucks! An artist has put imagination, effort and work into creating a new thing. After many revisions and improvements the artist finally feels that the work is good. She has put herself into the creation. She begins sending it out. It gets ignored and many rejections. It's hard not to take these personally. It's a struggle to maintain hope for that one "yes". It is a painful process for the writer.
Ted, thanks for the validation! To all writers out there, you know how this works. And yet, there is hope...
Great post Ted, I was figuring out my angle on this one and I was trying to compare to the experience of business guys like you and me. I guess we have had careers of multiple chances a week for people to not like our idea, slides, decision, meeting participation, hire, attitude at the moment (I'm leaving out 20 other reasons not to be liked just not coming to mind ha) and that was part of building tough skins or at least as tough as we could manage. But the artist version seems way more personal - as you say - put herself into the creation. And then two layers of people to like or not like - business and reader - both with a far more open access to the layer below skin, not for the faint of heart. Don't mind us, Susan..
I'd love to be well paid not to be liked! And who didn't like you two? You're pretty likeable people...And no, it's not all about the money. But it's hard not to factor it into the equation.
Artist path seems tough!
As far as recognition goes, yes. Now, if I can only cultivate a satisfaction from within, I'll be on my way!
Joel, I love your posts and insights. Here, you have captured my corporate experience perfectly. BTW - I have thought of you often after listening to “the power of now“.
Yes a thousand cuts ha! But hopefully something good happened from the efforts. I'm really glad that suggestion has been helpful, picked it up out here in California hippie land
Does that mean you're a hippie?
Hippie adjacent
That's a fair assessment.
Yup, me too. The power of now has changed us both - or, rather, is in the process of changing us both.
I "listened" to your words and what I heard was something I rarely hear: total honesty. Writing novels is a joy, but it is indeed a business. When the writing is done, it's time to trade your comfy author's hat for the less familiar hat of a sales person. It's never easy stepping out of one's comfort zone, but sometimes you just have to try. Thanks for sharing a truth about the trade we've chosen and keep writing!
Hi Vikki - you know this song and dance well. What I admire is how good you are at marketing. You can wear the other hat. Well done, writer friend!